How Hard Is It to Meet East Asian Women?
A lot of guys who are actively trying to get better with women are trying to meet them in the worst possible places. These are the same guys who get frustrated about their results and say things like, “Korean women are impossible to meet.”
When it comes down to it, it’s not always your own skill set that is holding you back. Sometimes it actually is the venue. Of course, you should be able to do decently in any venue if your social skills are sharp enough; but, if you’re trying to meet women in difficult places then your skill set has to be that much sharper.
An International Inspiration
I used to take the subway up from Bundang to talk to ladies in Gangnam. If you have ever been to Gangnam you know how good looking the girls are there. Gangnam also has a large concentration of wealthy Koreans and the people near Gangnam station always seem to be rushing off somewhere. When I got to Gangnam I would step out of the subway station and start hunting. My eyes would be scanning for a girl I was genuinely interested in. When I saw one she was usually storming down the sidewalk towards the train station or an office building. I would nearly have to sprint to catch up with her.
The conversation was usually as demanding. She would typically snub me right away, and she was no more receptive when I let loose with me witty humour or well-crafted conversation. Often she would end up lifting her phone up to her ear to fake a call or quicken her pace to get away from me.
I always found Gangnam challenging. International parties, on the other hand, always seem different. One of the great things about living in another country is that other people are busy trying to set up events where you can make friends. Some of those events are dubbed “international parties” and set up so locals and expats can meet and mingle. People there – girls and guys, Korean or foreigner – are always open to talking to you for a bit. Unlike Gangnam, nobody is in a hurry, people are friendly, and it’s incredibly easy to walk out of the place with plans to meet at least one girl later that week.
Set Things Up in Your Favour
The place you chose to meet women can have a huge effect on how well you do. These days I can do well in Gangnam, despite all the obstacles. Even now, though, if I choose an easier venue I can meet women with much less work. Gangnam is one of those places where high status Koreans and those wanting to get together with high status Koreans gravitate to. The girls spending time there are often shopping for men as well as shoes but the men that they want are typically young, wealthy Korean gents. That puts you, my foreign friends, at a disadvantage. Even those Korean women not choosing to spend time in Gangnam are usually there for work or school so have little time to talk to you. At least that’s been my experience.
Subway cars, sidewalks, office buildings, family events, dark alleys – all of these have their own unique challenge when it comes to meeting women and all of them are far from ideal places to spark up a conversation. In some cases the social pressure that comes with being “that girl,” the one who is open to dating foreign guys, is too much – even if she really likes you. At other times the environment sparks psychological pressure that keeps her from being receptive to a conversation. People brushing past, a good number of higher value guys around, an unsettling dimness – all of these can close off her receptivity to a conversation with you.
While guys with great social skill should be able to meet women where they choose to meet them, guys will ultimately end up having to work much harder in some venues than they will in others. The best places by far are places where mingling with the opposite sex – and, preferably, opposite race – is expected. Yes, this means international parties but it could also mean language exchange clubs. Somewhat more difficult, but still fairly easy, are places where people are hanging around and there might be some alcohol involved. Best yet are places where the girls outnumber the guys, and the guys on offer have a lot of self improvement to do.
It’s no wonder that “How to Meet Women in South Korea,” has been one of the top articles on the site for the past year. Venues really do count for a lot and if you want to make the most of your effort you’d best find a venue that’s conducive to meeting the kind of girls you want.