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Here’s an except:
First, some terminology:
- Seed = to talk about a location or activity that you like in the hopes of taking her there some point later
- Day 1 = the first time you meet
- Day 2 = the first date
- Day 3 = the second date
- Full-close = sex
- LMR = the last minute resistance to sex that most girls give before first having sex with a new guy
A Conversation with RedpoleQ
Mike: Okay so you like rolled cake [LAUGH]… Can you give me some more examples or other kinds of places that you would seed?
RedpoleQ: Yeah, certainly. Especially in Asia, because Asia means Asian people and Asian culture …taking her outside of what she would normally do as a local Asian, whether she’s Chinese, Korean, Japanese, or whatever, or taking her outside of what a local Asian guy would do on a date, is really great. This is assuming that this is a girl who doesn’t spend a lot of time with foreigners.
If she spends a lot of time with foreigners, on the reverse side, you might want to take her to places that are more …local culture, as well …because, in that sense, you are showing her more about your breadth of knowledge. She’s going to see that you know about foreign stuff, but she is not going to be expecting that you are going to know about Japanese stuff.
So if you take her to, lets say, a really small Japanese restaurant where you go regularly, that place where you know the old man behind the counter and when you walk in he is like “Oh! Hey how are you?” and he has a little conversation with you, that’s great because that’s not what she is going to be expecting from a foreign guy.
But assuming that she doesn’t have a lot of experience with foreigners, you want to take her to things that she would not usually be exposed to. Some examples of that would be the improv comedy group my friend is in. Bringing girls to his show is something that they wouldn’t normally experience; and, that has multiple elements because also part of that is the fact that you’re not just taking her there but your friend is one of the performers so that just makes you look good.
“…And that Raises Your Value…”
Mike: Sure, you know cool guys.
RedpoleQ: Right! You know cool guys. Exactly. …and that raises your value quite a bit. Also, by not going just as a customer, but by knowing the people, you are obviously in a place where you are really comfortable, and she is not going to be as comfortable which is a topic that we’ll go into more later when we discuss emotions.
Another example would be a hookah bar, if she’s never smoked a hookah before. For western girls, maybe that’s not such a big deal, depending on the girl. In fact, for some girls, a hookah may be kind of light because they might be expecting something a little bit more… effective. [LAUGHTER] In that case she might be disappointed. A lot of Asian girls haven’t been to a hookah bar so that’s a good example of something. For some girls, they think it’s really scary because they think it’s drugs!! But that’s pretty rare. Most girls are willing to give it a try.
Another good one is taking her to western restaurants or other foreign food places… like an awesome hamburger restaurant, for example. That’s a great one because it’s so obviously not try hard, which gives the date a casual feel. If you want to impress a girl, you are not going to take her out for hamburgers, but if the hamburgers are awesome and really delicious then she’ll know that you really just wanted to go there. Taking her for other foreign foods is fine too. It doesn’t really matter what kind, but French and Italian are pretty standard, so unless there is some place that really is set apart for some reason, like it’s a brick oven pizzeria because there aren’t that many brick oven pizzerias floating around…
Mike: And she’s probably never been to one.
RedpoleQ: Right! She’s probably never been to one, so that adds an extra element to the ambiance, so that might work well if you are going to do Italian. Instead, you might want to take her to something that she is not really familiar with like Spanish food, or Mexican food, or Ethiopian food, or… you know, just something that really is outside of her comfort zone.
“One of My Day 2 Plans is Taking Girls to Really Rundown Neighborhoods…”
RedpoleQ: You could do a picnic. I mean that’s great when the weather is good. We have one student who uses a picnic at the park as part of his regular Day2 and he would take them home after the picnic and have sex in the middle of the afternoon. One of my Day 2 plans is taking girls to really rundown neighborhoods where girls of course never go. They’ve usually heard about it but they’ve never been so it’s a totally different and fascinating experience.
I’ll explain more why that is really good later on when we talk about what kind of emotional states you want to elicit during the Day 2. Another great Day 2 plan is, if you can cook, invite her over for cooking. Now this is often more difficult because you’re inviting her to be alone with you in your house, so you’re generally going to need more than 20 or 30 minutes on the Day 1 to get a girl to feel comfortable enough to come over to your place.
Alternatively, in that situation it might be easier to actually go over to her place, which is simply because now she’s on her turf. On the other hand, the negative part about that is that, from your perspective, she’s in total control and she’s more comfortable in that place than you are and, in this situation, she might be answering the phone, or maybe her friends are going to stop by. You have no idea what kind of situation you’re walking into …and there are some horror stories. From her perspective, the thing that’s not really so great about it is that now you know where she lives and, if you turn out to be a stalker, she’s in serious trouble. It is possible to do that, though I wouldn’t really recommend it because you’re stepping into a situation where she has more control over all of the elements of the Day 2 than you do. And that’s not really a good position for you to be in. We’ll talk more about that also later on.
“…it Gives You Lots of Opportunities To Be Physical.”
RedpoleQ: The zoo can be good, too. I know, I know, you think the zoo is lame, and it could be lame but on the other hand… when was the last time she went to the zoo? There is another thing that is really good about the zoo, as well – you know you are going to be moving around a lot, and that is always good because it gives you lots of opportunities to be physical, but we will talk about that more later.
Kane Vast takes his girls to see graffiti and sometimes will even organize to bring paint so they can make something together. Orion took a girl to play frisbee in the park and she’s running around in a little dress trying to catch the frisbee. There are so many cool things you can do.
There could be an art exhibit that you want to see like—and this isn’t necessarily highly recommended but it definitely isn’t try hard—that exhibit where they have the human bodies that are preserved and you can see their insides and stuff…you know that one?
Mike: Did you take your girl to that?
RedpoleQ: I went with one of my girls to that, it was her idea! [LAUGHTER]
Mike: But that wasn’t a Day 2.
“…She is Not Going to Be Thinking that You Are Trying to Impress Her…”
RedpoleQ: Yeah this wasn’t a Day 2, that was like a Day 358, and in case you are wondering, I full-closed her on the Day 2. [LAUGHTER] A lot of LMR on that one… Anyway, that’s definitely the kind of thing that your typical guy would not take a girl to on a date. So, she is not going to be thinking that you are trying to impress her, especially because you are coming across as socially intelligent guy. If you are coming across as nerdy then definitely you don’t want to take her there because you are going to be fitting into that frame of “I’m this big nerd guy.”
But if you’re a cool guy who is really chill, and you’re like “Yeah like, human bodies are so freaky, lets go check them out,” she’ll see that as just being a fun thing.
Whatever Happened to Dinner and a Movie?
RedpoleQ: Now that’s not to say that you can’t do things that are somewhat “normal” but it will be more fun for you and it will be more fun for her. So I’m not saying that if you take her on a typical dinner date that you are guaranteed not to get laid. That’s not the case at all but we are talking about how to make things as effective and smooth as possible, and fun for both you and her.
Mike: Okay, but I notice you are not saying stay away from dinner. Usually when we think of dates in the traditional sense, you think of dinner and a movie or something … something on those lines. But you are not saying don’t do dinner at all you are saying do something different. That doing something different within that context even is still good
RedpoleQ: Yeah. There is nothing wrong with having dinner I mean the fact is that generally, on average it takes anywhere from three to ten hours from meet to sex with a woman, depending on the logistics, your schedule during the day, the social dynamic—if you initially meet her and she is with a group of three or four friends, it’s going to take longer than if you initially meet her and she is alone at a coffee shop. Because, if she is alone then you are going to have that chance to make that one on one connection whereas if she is with friends then you are going to have to talk to her friends and she is going to be talking to her friends, so it will just take longer for things to move forward.
And, of course, it also depends on the woman, as well, and how good your skills are. But generally we say three to ten hours for what we call a solid sarge, a solid pick up. When we say solid, what we mean is that you’ve covered all of the elements that make a pick-up lead to sex and a long term relationship if you so choose to have it turn into that.
So, if you are going to be spending anywhere from three to ten hours with a girl, it’s pretty likely that somewhere in there you are going to be eating. Especially because whenever possible on the Day2, we want to progress to sex.
Don’t forget to check out my new book, The Perfect First Date, so you can spark sexual relationships with the women you want!