Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict, and Other Bedroom Battles1sex pattern and cheating

by Kane Vast

Ohhhhhh Yeah! Sexy time!

Welcome to this weeks article! We’re going to start off right where we left off with last week’s article, Is She Cheating on You? Using Patterns to Tell. This time we’re jumping right into the dirty stuff – lets start it off with the Sex Pattern! Here we go…

 Sex Pattern

Girls like sex and they will quite easily fall into a regular pattern of having sex with you when they stay over. They will also do things in relatively the same way, meaning the same amount of time for foreplay, the same positions, and the same amount of time for the act itself.

Side note: Girls are usually very curious and this can be a strong motivator for them to try new things, so check out our websites section on sex. If you’re the one providing new and interesting sexual experience she is less likely to seek them else where.

Girls usually learn about sex from three different sources, one is talking to their friends, another is porn and the last is actual experience/men. The first is the most common way for her to learn about sex and depending on her attitude towards sex she may or may not learn about new things to do from her friends. Watching porn is not so common in Asia, though, as many Asian girls don’t view it as something they can do – they just don’t want to feel like one of those bad girls. Occasionally you’ll find a girl who is really good in bed due to a lot of experience with men, or after having been trained by another guy who was good in bed and knew how to communicate well with her about what he wanted.

Identifying the sex pattern is quite easy. By about the 10th time you’ve slept together, you two will most likely have settled into doing things a particular way. Look for commonalities or repetition in time, activities, positions, and even the desires she has.

Breaking the Pattern

You should be aware of her wanting you to try any new position (the exception is that if she is quite open about sex and watches porn, or has a very dominant personality and tries to lead the relationship) or doesn’t feel like having sex that day and won’t tell you why. This is usually a sign of guilt – if it is some other problem, aside from embarrassing issues with “female health,” then girls will usually share their thoughts or feelings.

Also wanting rougher sex than usual can be a sign of guilt, or a way for her to relieve her guilt. If she asks you to hit her while you’re making love, for example, and this is something that’s very out of place, then you might want to take note.

If she is refusing to give you sex and doesn’t seemingly have a good reason, this should also be worth noting and paying a bit more attention to. It could mean that she is rethinking the relationship or has done something with someone else and doesn’t feel right about doing something with you at that time.


If you have a girlfriend and you regularly have sex with a condom and then one day she has sex with you very urgently and without a condom you should be especially careful that she isn’t already pregnant from another guy – this is not exactly really common but it certainly can happen. Here, the woman’s plan is to get pregnant from you to cover up the fact that another guy knocked her up. From an evolutionary sense this is her best move. If you want to learn more about the drives behind this tactic, and others like it, take a look at the book Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict, and Other Bedroom BattlesSperm Wars.


I can see the Sex Pattern making a lot of guys out there super paranoid and freaked out, so I’m going to add this small clause:selfish gene

Your girlfriend could also just be trying to make you like her more, satisfy you more and make you happier by doing better in bed, and this is extremely likely as Asian girls are quite considerate in this way. If you’re still concerned, you can test by asking where she got the info from or why she started doing things a particular way and then getting her to show you the source of the information.

 Regular Meeting Pattern

This Pattern is a little specific, if the girl lives outside of home (i.e not with the parents) then she will have a lot more freedom in what she can do and where she can go. You can expect that she will not usually bring guys back to her house unless she is serious about them as this poses a security risk to her – a lot of girls have trouble with stalkers or ex bf’s who won’t bugger off – and potentially to her relationship with you, if she is cheating.

So if you’re meeting her the same amount of times every week, and she is regularly going to your house, this will create a pattern I call the Regular Meeting Pattern. As with most patterns, it’s quite easy to identify.

Note: from my experience girls pay attention to your patterns much more than you will to theirs. If you finish work by 6pm every day and you’re usually home by 7pm, she will be very aware of this. If you don’t come home by that time one day, she will be wondering what you’re doing.

Asian girls are very good at setting patterns and controlling how much information you have about her whereabouts and life, so it’s important to take note about what she regularly does from as many sources as possible. I’m not saying to spy on your girlfriend, I’m just saying to be aware.

Breaking the Pattern

Many years ago when I was a young lad (I’m the ripe old age of 30 now…) I had a wonderful Thai girlfriend called Ay. She and I were together for a year and developed a regular meeting pattern of me going to her house 2 or 3 times a week from Monday to Friday, and then her coming to my house for one day on the weekends. She told me that she lived with her brother who was also Thai and that he worked a lot, which is why I never met him while I was at her house.

At about a week after our yearly anniversary I broke the pattern and went over to her house to see her, but this time I didn’t tell her I was on the way, since I wanted to surprise her with a present. Believe me when I say that Asian girls are extremely good at this tactic of breaking the pattern, which is actually their sweet way of checking up on you. One of my friends had his Japanese girlfriend bringing over a big box of peaches for him, for example, unannounced of course.

I turned up at her house and a guy answered the door. I spoke with him assuming it was the brother and about 30 minutes later discovered it was the husband. He and Ay had been married for 8 years and she had kept me under wraps for an entire year. He worked from 8am till 5pm at an office job, then from 6pm till 9pm as a cleaner, and finished off his night at the gym from 9pm till 11pm. She developed two regular meeting patterns and played them out quite well in order to keep us separate. It was only upset when I consciously decided to break the pattern just to see what would happen. In case all this isn’t clear enough, if you suspect something then you should break the pattern by making a surprise appearance under a good pretext. You might be amazed what you find.

Lucky You

This week you’ve gotten two critical patterns, the Sex Pattern and the Regular Meeting Pattern. The Sex Pattern is very crucial for surviving relationships and seeing past the deceptions people can spin. The Regular Meeting Pattern is also one of the best ways to see what is really going on! Really focus on understanding how to break the pattern and how to do it in a way that won’t ruin your relationship. Japanese girls are particularly good at this, they will turn up with peaches or some other present to give you as they are such sweet girls, and they’re able to check up on you and your nefarious deeds as a bonus.

Until next time,


P.S Next week I will be dishing out more awesomeness: Lies and Lying, East Vs West. Don’t miss out, make sure to subscribe on our home page! And pick up The Selfish Gene though Amazon!